thanks for the eyebags

oh come on, was it really what i said or was it something you ASSUMED that i said (or the meaning you put into my words) that ruined your day?

i am not thanking you for the eyebags, it was my choice to stay up late and dwell in my anger. nothing can affect me unless i allowed it. my anger did the eyebags.

now i choose to have a beautiful morning.




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my own unofficial cake review

i admit i am hard to please when it comes to cake. i love cake and ice cream and chocolates too. and when it comes to these three, i am always in pursuit of the finest, most delectable, and heavenly taste there is. i remember having traveled to los banos a couple of times in college just to have a slice of their chocolate cake. mind you, it was not even sold in some fancy restaurant there nor even in a bakeshop. it was in that little glass canteen in IRRI where my friends and i (accidentally) found that delicious cake.

since it's the yuletide season, i was again challenged to put something new on the table. on christmas, i bought almond choco sansrival from conti's. i developed a relationship with conti's a few years ago when a friend gave me and my housemates a mango bravo cake as a gift. i liked the variety of bread and nuts in it and so that year, i brought home a mango bravo for christmas and my family loved it. since then, whenever a special occasion comes, they always ask me to buy a cake from conti's. we've tasted almost all of their classic cakes. the almond choco sansrival were one of the new ones. i served it with a scoop of very strawberry ice cream from selecta for dessert. mom and my sisters loved it (dad and my brother love anything sweet). for me, the combination was perfect. the cake was not chocolatey as i assumed. the chocolate was spread thinly in between layers. the nougaty sansrival was chewy but not overly sweet and the almonds and cashew were plenteous. the strawberry ice cream complimented it well.

for the new year, i went all the way to Times street to order a mango torte from dulcelin. i was drawn to try it because of the many good reviews i have read. one of those even branded it as the best mango torte in manila, selling 2,000+ box every christmas season. that was impressive considering it was only a home based business. for me, the taste was ok, though something i will not rave about. it reminded me of the mango ref cake i usually make back then when the graham crackers were a hit, well, minus the graham of course. its base was interesting having that crumbly sweet nutty texture which i later found out was a cashew-based nougatine (thanks to the reviews again). i partnered it with a scoop of selecta's chocolate truffles. i must admit the combination was a disaster. it was too sweet.

sad that i didn't have pictures of the cakes. i got lazy to get a camera hihi.

i already made plans for my next stop. it will be that cake store which i won't name yet here (secret muna) located in greenbelt 5 which, according to the review, sells one of the best chocolate cake in the metro. that i really can't wait to try.




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one batch. one decade. one great reunion

i was there. half an hour before the party was over. on that day, i was out from work at 7pm, my best buds, D and K, arrived at my house at 9pm then we waited some more somewhere in q.c. for R (we fondly call her first lady now). it's been a while since we saw our dear friend FL (first lady) and i was happy to be her passenger on our way to the venue (the two boys were in another car). we may not have been the best of friends in hs but our ties were drawn closer being the only two female in a group of 12. yes, im not their only princess as what it usually appears like. its just that im here and FL now lives in zambales with her dear hubby and daughter.

i had no plans of attending that reunion. even JB's persuasiveness didn't affect me . maybe because i had more bad memories then being one of the most bullied girl in the batch. i would even believe i could pass as the most hated girl in HS not because i was the most wicked cruelest person but because i didn't befriend those "uptown girls". i was happy to be simple. i didn't even care if i own nothing branded. we weren't rich to begin with and i wouldn't, for the life of me, ask mom to buy me a bag or a pair of shoes that will cost a thousand bucks just to show off. that annoying group wouldn't have noticed my existence if only the most famous and sort of influential person in the batch didn't have a crush on me and a rich girl (she was really rich and not just pretending to be one) didn't make me her best friend. maybe what even made the matter worse was that i was not really that accommodating back then. my shyness was mistaken as kasungitan. i was too shy to mingle. i was even scared of my own voice. (that is why i braved to join theater to overcome that shyness and eventually became a core group officer of that organization in my senior year which i also believe added more fire to their anger). so i spent my high school being the object of their hatred. i bet someone got to hate me first before she get accepted in their group. i was just happy that the few friends i had then stayed by my side and that they saw that im not really a bad person and i didn't deserve to be treated that way. i have to say i even enjoyed college more. i had freedom in college and i learned more about the realities of life then. so upto the last minute my decision was to stay home and forget all about the reunion. But i guess i was bound to be there. by some twist of fate, someone gave me her ticket for free and on the last minute, someone offered me a ride (my driver was not really on a vacation. i just made it up coz i really didn't want to go). it was nice having seen those familiar faces again after a decade of not seeing each other. a lot have changed now. i didn't feel the division anymore. everybody was happy to mingle and take pictures with each other. the party didn't even end there. we went to pasig for an after party. i got home at 5am (my latest ever).

i love the slogan of our reunion: one batch. one decade. one grand party.









MCS high school class '99 reunion
the legend villas, mandaluyong city
december 30, 2009

after party:
Metrowalk, Pasig City





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make way for the perfect 10

goodbye 2009, hello 2010! the past year had been full of drama. it started with a bang and ended with an unexpected twist. nonetheless, 2009 had given me a lot of lessons and some of the most important milestones in my life.

i hope 2010 will be a better year not just for me but also for my loved ones. i do hope that i carry with me the lessons i got from the past year.

these are my plans, wishes and resolution for this year:

> get myself into residency

> live on my own

> wish my ASO will be normal and my immune system strengthen.

> no more RF flare this year!

> hope ties will be strengthened, gap will be filled, and learn to forgive and forget.

> hear mass more often.

> pray the rosary everyday

> less FB and more bonding time with friends

> read more

> exercise often

> eat less (awww....) and eat healthy

> make a monthly budget and stick with it

> resurrect the pamper-me-day

> continue to blog often. it really helps when you read yourself =) very therapeutic

> wake up early

> speak up more but with caution

> discover new places

> learn new crafts

> organize my e- files


these were the important lessons i learned the past year:

> live within your means and within your seams

> conserve energy

> never give up

> use plastic prudently

> recycle

> shut up when you have nothing good to say (this was very challenging)

> patience (i am getting along with this virtue pretty well. woohoo!)

> embrace change

> generosity, humility and compassion.

> learning to trust that there is a perfect time for everything

> health is wealth

> that life is a bore if things keep going your way.

> pag gusto may paraan. pag ayaw maraming dahilan. (parang kanta lang)

> listen more than talk more

> No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

> breeding can't be acquired in school nor can be brought by gold.

> life won't go exactly how you planned it. giving up is not the answer to this but rather becoming more flexible.



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duets

ive been listening to this song the whole night and this morning too. ganda. didn't know they were pinoy until i saw this in youtube. kudos rey and kaye for the very good rendition.








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conversations

this thing called cellphone drew people into texting because its cheaper than calling or meeting up with someone you wanted to greet, catch up with, or have a heart to heart talk with not minding what was lost there. texting makes room for misinterpretation coz it just couldn't convey emotions. maybe that's why they have created those smileys/ emoticons but they're just not enough, are they? almost forgot i have the wonder sun cell wherein calls were free. yeah. so i guess it's my fault for not calling. coz i was misinterpreted. ok. lesson learned.

i just realized that we are slaves of emotion. but not all the time it will succeed as a weapon for manipulating people. i'm hating all these drama. it seems it had created a cloud of hallucination hovering people making everyone react to everything rather than thinking first before reacting. and i hate becoming a part of this. well it's a choice i made and i'm hating my decision now. but how do you cut your ties and just walk away or choose to be indifferent, perhaps? i don't know. maybe it's time to breathe fresh air. that's what everybody needs now and that's exactly what i will do.




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a new year is coming

i'm still not done yet with my new year's resolution. i guess, a little more time for reflection for me. one of my favorite blogs have reposted this and i liked most of what were written here. im re-reposting it so i can also have my own copy. hehe.

have a prosperous year ahead.


Health:
I wish you happiness, good health and peace as we close out the year
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants..
4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
5. Make time to pray.
6. Play more games
7. Read more books than you did in 2009
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:
11. Don't compare your life to others... You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don't over do.. Keep your limits.
14. Don't take yourself so seriously.. No one else does.
15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with His/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree...

Society:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time w/ people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. GOD heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change..
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come..
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

here's another one:

I Believe...

That just because two people argue,
It doesn't mean they don't love each other.
And just because they don't argue,
It doesn't mean they do love each other.

I Believe...
That we don't have to change friends if
We understand that friends change.

I Believe....
That no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that.

I Believe...
That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.

Same goes for true love.

I Believe....
That you can do something in an instant
That will give you heartache for life..

I Believe...
That it's taking me a long time
To become the person I want to be.

I Believe...
That you should always leave loved ones with
Loving words. It may be the last time you see them..

I Believe...
That you can keep going long after you think you can't.

I Believe...
That we are responsible for what
We do, no matter how we feel.

I Believe....
That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

I Believe...
That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences.

I Believe...
That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

I Believe...
That my best friend and I, can do anything, or nothing and have the best time.

I Believe...
That sometimes the people you expect to kick you When you're down, will be the ones to help you get back up..

I Believe...
That sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry,
But that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.

I Believe...
That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you've had
And what you've learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you've celebrated.

I Believe...
That it isn't always enough, to be forgiven by others.
Sometimes, you have to learn to forgive yourself.

I Believe...
That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn't stop for your grief.

I Believe...
That our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are,
But, we are responsible for who we become.

I Believe...
That you shouldn't be so eager to find
Out a secret. It could change your life Forever.

I Believe...
Two people can look at the exact same
Thing and see something totally different.

I Believe...
That your life can be changed in a matter of
Hours by people who don't even know you.

I Believe....
That even when you think you have no more to give, when
A friend cries out to you - you will find the strength to help.

I Believe...
That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

I Believe...
That the people you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.

I Believe...
That you should send this to all of the people that you believe in, I just did.

'The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything;
They just make the most of everything.




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isang maligayang pasko

na naman ang nagdaan sa buhay ko. simula nung naranasan kong hindi magpasko sa bahay dahil napakaswerte ko na laging duty tuwing pasko at new year, hindi na ko naghahanap pa ng kung ano anong eche bureche. masaya na ako sa simpleng reason na nasa bahay ako kasama ng pamilya ko. wala man boyfriend, mamahaling regalo o kung ano pa man, okay lang.

hinahanap ko dito ang post ko tungkol sa pinakamalungkot na pasko ko. pero hindi ko yun mahanap. ikukwento ko nalang ulit. nung nasa clerkship pa ako, duty ako ng christmas and new year's eve sa pinakamalungkot na bahagi ng hospital, ang CCU- ICU. napakatahimik. kasama ko ang mga pasyenteng half- conscious. hindi nga ata sila aware na pasko na. wala kami nun ma- orderan kase wala nang bukas na fast food chain. buti nalang madaming pinabaon si mami kaya nakakain kaming lahat. habang ang buong hospital ay nag- iingay, nagsasaya, nagbabatian ng merry chistmas, kaming tatlo nila angel at abary ay nagmomonitor ng walang humpay na q15. yun ang unang pagkakataon na hindi ko na napigilang umiyak. hindi ako talaga iyakin pero sa pagkakataon na yon naiyak ako dahil naramdaman ko talaga ang lungkot. kaya ganito nalang ang pagkasaya ko na makasama ang pamilya ko sa araw ng pasko. isa pa, naiisip ko ang daddy ko. tuwing sasapit ang ganitong okasyon, nagpapasalamat ako sa Diyos na nakasama ko pa sya sa araw na yun. happy na ko na alam kong anjan sya kahit pa tulog na sya pagsapit ng 12am. hehe. sana lagi pa rin syang anjan para sa amin.

merry christmas sa inyong lahat! sana nakasama nyo lahat ng mga mahal nyo sa buhay.


sa ibang bagay, matatapos na ang bathroom ni mami. hindi na ko nagpilit pa na- idagdag ang mga iron pieces para sa mediterranean look. pero sinunod pa din naman ang outdoor feel. wish ko matapos na sya before mag new year. ang alikabok kase dito sa bahay.




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hang on till tomorrow

ganda ng boses ng batang ito. mala- anghel ang dating.

this is my favorite song right now. so full of hope for the future.

our bathroom in the first floor is currently under renovation. mom and i went to ace hardware earlier to window shop tiles and ceramics. i think mom wants to have an outdoor feel for the new bathroom. gusto nya yung parang bato- bato effect na tiles for the floor. naaliw naman ako sa gusto ni mother. hehe. excited na ko na makita ang outcome. sana maganda. crossing my fingers.




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good mawning

this is so not me. i dont know why i got up early today after sleeping late last night. what is happening??




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pick up lines

okay. i must admit i am enjoying those pick up lines. i do not believe any of them and i know its not getting anywhere. but they really make me laugh. and no im not sharing them. its for my eyes only haha.




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fairy tale come true

i was in taal vista yesterday for my bff's wedding. another bridesmaid role for me there. a few days back i told my sister that it was edward teng who made the gowns of the entourage. this declaration was followed by a question which astonished my sister, who is edward teng? turned out he is one of my sister's favorite designers. sorry di ako sosyal kaya di ko sya kilala. after searching him on the internet, i learned that wedding is his forte. now im glad to have worn one of his creations. click here to view his website.

i love the bead work of my gown. more wedding photos in my flickr.

it was nice going back to tagaytay. it's one place i never get tired of going back to. i considered it as my second home ever since i have stayed there for sometime. having a feel of the cold breeze there especially during this season is something i really enjoyed. it was the first time that i have worn sleeveless there. i stayed outdoors for two hours because the wedding took place in the garden of taal vista overlooking the lake and i really felt that i was inappropriately dressed for the weather. the wind was so cold that i can feel it seeping through my skin down to my bones as if consuming every part of my body and then left me standing there frozen and bare naked. but id rather have that than the scorching heat of summer.

i realized i am giving away two of my bffs this year and within the same month. and how do i feel about that? mixed emotions. it's every girls dream to walk down the aisle. wedding is like a fairy tale come true and so i am happy for them and i am thankful to be a part of their unforgettable moment as they finally get their happy endings and start new beginnings as a wife and (soon-to-be) mother. i am also a little sad that we cannot hang out with each other as much as we wanted to. gone were the days that we can have sleep overs and night outs. their priorities are different now and they have more responsibilities than before. we are really getting old. hay. the realities of life.





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funny it seems

how i am able to contain it. how was it possible that a girl like me get through every day when she used to need a distant friend to pour her heart out when situations like this arise? is it wisdom i get in getting old that makes me this strong? is it faith in the almighty that makes me trust the unknown? or is it the hard times that's keeping me preoccupied? whatever it is, what matters is that it is serving it's purpose well. more importantly, there are values re- learned and strengthened. patience is not an easy friend and i am amazed how we get along now.




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today's great finds

i just got home from shoe mart. ever since i became an editor, i made it a point to go to the mall early so i can get back by noon for my work. today, i went there to buy blank cds for some of the wedding songs that my bff will use on tuesday (naku lapit na!!!). i also decided to drop by starbuko to buy that frap i've been craving for since yesterday. i was surprised when the cashier gave me a bag of coffee for free. swerte ko naman. i was planning to give it away since i only drink coffee on occasion due to my hyperacidity but dad was attracted to it's rich aroma and wanted to try it so i am obliged to buy him filter paper for his coffee maker hehe.

i also went to national bookstore to buy some sticker paper for the cds' label and bought a copy of this month's issue of reader's digest too. since it's christmas month, i also get to have a free back issue. woohoo! i love freebies and i love reader's digest.

also, i saw pilot selling magic ballpens and magic highlighters. wonder what is magical about them? well, coz the ink is erasable. both have a silver gray tip which serves as an eraser. i guess i have to buy lord zagato a black erasable pen. it's very handy in the exam coz some of the forms they have to fill up on the first day are a bit eye challenging and they only allow examiners to use ink on those. so to my dear lord zagato, in case you read this, you don't have to look for the pen coz im going to buy you one, okay?

>>

ouch!

We all have the ability…we just don't all have the courage to follow our dreams and to follow the signs

this was what paolo coelho told me today in FB. kinabog ako dun. yup, i admit that i am a chicken now. the fearless and taray queen before eh dinadaga na din ngayon.

nalilito kase ako sa mga signs... or possible na hindi lang ako masyadong nagppay attention.

so i made up my mind. im willing to retrace my path in order to see those signs again... and this time ill look at them closer.




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